DAY 9
It's Monday again, and I'm feeling good about being back at work. The pair of slacks I put on today fit me nicely (they usually don't) and I'm hoping to get back on schedule with my feedings, after my really slack weekend. I'm planning on pumping myself full of water to make up for not having enough over the weekend, and to hopefully kick out some of the nicotine in my system.
I ended up staying at work all day and not taking a lunch. Instead of juicing at noon, I just had a green drink. Nasty, yes. But, for the first time since my early 20's, I've rekindled my long-lost ability to chug a beverage. I've got it down to a science: Pick a spot on the wall to stare at so I don't have to look at the green mess in my bottle, don't breathe, and I can have that sucker knocked back in 10 gulps flat! Woo hoo! It's just like my old bar-rat days - only it's not fun, and you don't get drunk. On the positive side, slamming green drinks doesn't give me a hangover.
When I got home from work, I hung out with the family in the shop, and had, yep, about a half a pack of cigarettes. What is wrong with me? They make my throat feel like ass the next day, but they're my smoky treats. It sounds ridiculous, but smoking is like a hobby to me. It's what I do to relax and unwind. I'm finding that it's really hard to cold turkey quit drinking, smoking, biting my nails (because you're not supposed to CHEW anything) and EATING all at once. I'm trying not to smoke, but also I'm not going to beat myself up about it for now. I really would like to quit, but I don't know that now is the time. This not eating thing is pretty stressful. Here I am making excuses again. My worry is that since smoking is basically reintroducing toxins into my body, that it will slow or stop my weight loss progress.
My daughter also reminded me that I've gotten away from walking a mile daily as the detox suggests, to get my bowels moving. I'll have to do better on that. But not tonight.
By the time Justin and I went inside it was already 10:00. I didn't want the leftover soup in the fridge, and I didn't want to spend 45 minutes cooking up a fresh one, so I slammed a green drink, took my pills, and headed to bed.
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Dude, cannot say it enough - sooooooo proud of you!!!! SO, SO, SO PROUD!!!! AND - guess what?!?!?! You are HALF WAY DONE!!!! It is all down hill from here! You can do it, you are on the down side of things! You are kicking this detox's ass and making it look like cake! <--sorry, that was cruel. You're making it look like....carrots?? Yeah, even that was prob a bit of torture...but I don't want to insult you and say you're making it look PVM (puree veg mush), cuz that's just rude. But yeah...SO PROUD!!! LOVES!!!!
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